How ya doing, ugly? Funny how when life is most eventful, you sit dormant and boring. Maybe it’s because I (still) do not have the Internet at home, so when I do get access, I am all busy looking up homework-related stuff and Google-stalking folks* and paying the VISA bill, rushing to do it all in the hour or so of wi-fi granted by the purchase of a cup of coffee.
I am leaving Vancouver. Beautiful, beautiful Vancouver. Land of bike lanes, hairy armpits on girls, open-late cafes, many sexy libraries, and the murmuring sea. I am moving to Port Alberni. THE DEVIL, YOU SAY?! But my husband has a new job there. In fact, R. has lived there the past 2 months, while I finish out Semester 2 in bachelorette squalor in the old apartment. I can transfer neatly into the Nursing program offered over there. Tuition is even half the price as in the city! There is really no reason not to go. We are already gone, basically.
When you Google “Port Alberni” the first results that show up: it was recently decided to be the Worst Place in Canada to Live. However, since the same deciders said some unpopped boil of an Edmonton suburb is the Best Place to Live, I say nuts to them. (Nervous sweat.)
Port Alberni is pretty bad, though. The downtown is all boarded up and there’s no bicycle infrastructure and there is not one, not one vegetarian restaurant, and there is a pervasive funny smell courtesy of the institution from which we’ll derive our bread-and-margarine (paper mill).
But I’m only going to say it this once, about the dumpiness. I told my husband we must break the habit of negatively framing the facts of our existence.
*I’m looking your way, Nikola Tesla